Wednesday, January 05, 2005

Random Thought

Okay, go with me on this one.

Do people realize how close we are to the chance of immortality?

Look at the state of our science and technology. At a level that is approaching fundamental, we understand the behavior of mass and light, which, if you read closely, is an almost all-inclusive statement.

We can almost understand the strange combination of chemical elements that makes up the aqueous, salt, and organic molecules which combine to form proteins, cells, and flesh, and eventually life. Modern techniques can almost reconstruct, if not regrow the fabric of life in the exact form required.

How far are we from the regrowth of body or brain and having a lifespan of limitless existence? Will I live long enough to find out, and will I be wealthy enough to afford it?

Given the choice, how long would I live before I decided I needed to die?


Farewell Reader, have a good day.

Hussman

Saturday, January 01, 2005

Ich bin ein Berliner!

Dear Reader: If you have not the time nor the inclination to read this whole post, then I recommend going to The Icing On The Cake, which is the story of one of those times that must be shared.

It's been over forty years since John F. Kennedy announced to the world that he was a jelly doughnut with sugar coating (proper German would have had him say, 'Ich bin Berliner,' however, the Germans are used to hearing their language butchered, and they got his point), and many things have changed in the city of Berlin since then. In my various visits to Europe, I had never been able to make it to the new old capital of Germany, and almost every German will tell you that the city is the one you should see first.

I had known that I would make it to Berlin this trip, but I wasn't sure how. I had found out that Oliver was with his girlfriend and her parents this trip, and he would be too busy. Alex told me that her father, Guenther, and her uncle Wolfgang wanted to go, and we planned to go on the 26th and 27th of December. Wolfgang was a welcome edition. While Guenther understands a lot of English, and I'm pleased with how well my German is progressing; Guenther doesn't speak English well, I'm not fluent in German. Wolfgang's English is quite competent. Put simply, (I know, too late) he saved a lot of time flipping through the dictionary.

On the Road Again
We decided make the three hour drive from Hannover, and this was one of the more interesting parts of the trip. Our first stop was looking at the Helmstedt memorial of the former border between East and West Germany. The former checkpoint had about a dozen lanes, and Wolfgang and Guenther explained how it would require hours to make it through the checkpoint, and with one false word, you could be there for days. Wolfgang also mentioned how they used mirrors to look under cars. I mentiond that nuclear power plant security stations often do this now, and he said in an ironic tone, 'Ah, you get to reap the benefits of Communism.'

What was more interesting is that he said that he never imagined that the checkpoint would be a memorial before his death. It's at this point I began to realize the effects of the Cold War on Germany. In my experience, Germans accept the blame for what happened during the world wars, but what the Russians did afterwards was not warranted.

As soon as the checkpoint was crossed, there was an immediate difference in the quality of the roads and supporting infrastructure. Where before there were sturdy guardrails and very smooth surfaces, afterwards there were rather shabby guardrails, poorly constructed houses, and the road was a little less well maintained. It was apparent that many changes had taken place, but there was still much work to be done.

Not All Conference Rooms Are Alike
Before arriving in Berlin, Wolfgang wanted to visit Potsdam briefly, as he had not seen city or Schloss Sansoucci (which is gorgeous). Next to the Schloss (castle, in German) is Cecilienhof, the site of the famous conference between Truman, Churchill, and Stalin where they determined the fate of Germany after the war. Wolfgang told me that not long after the conference Churchill had remarked that they had 'slaughtered the wrong pig,' of course implying Stalin.

An interesting remark by Wolfgang was that this memorial was a place of sadness for many Germans because it is where the decisions about their life were made without their input because they lost. I mentioned that life was better now, and wondered what it would be like if Hitler won. He replied, 'Of course, but nevertheless...' We saw some more monuments and left.

Bright Lights, Big City
On to Berlin. In some cities, such as Paris, London, and San Francisco, I feel like the city itself has a personality, a life to it, that would be there even without the people. My first impression was that Berlin had it also. Before our trip, Alex had written down a list of sights that we needed to visit (I'm glad that Alex plans these things, because that's not for me). We checked into the NH hotel near Friedrichstrasse, and began our marathon trek around the city.

I won't bother with a detailed blow-by-blow (you'll understand the foreshadowing in a moment) of the trip, but I'll hit the highlights. Because of the war damage, sometimes Berlin has a mixed feel of the old and the new. Some of the real beautiful buildings survived, such as the Berliner Dom, Brandenburger Tuer, and Reichstag, others were not so lucky, like the Kaiser Wilhelm Memorial Church, which remains a memorial ruin.

A couple of interesting stories. As we were entering the Berliner Dom, standing in the garten alone was a woman screaming for no real reason. Every three or five seconds she would scream in a way that would curdle a banshee's blood. Only once did she say anything intelligible, something like I refuse to live under a dictator! Guenther asked which one, but we received no reply. We entered the doors hearing yet another a shriek, and saw the graves of Fredrick the Great. As we left the Dom an hour later, we heard her lovely singing voice yet again. Then I understood, we weren't watching a psycho scream for no apparent reason, we were the fortunate witnesses of performance art.

Another interesting facet of the city is that some of the waitresses in Berlin are very attractive, and the rest are stunning! Because of this fact, I thought I should advise the reader in just a little German so you may impress the ladies with your efforts in their language.

Ich haette gern eines grosses Bier, bitte.
(ISH HAY-ta GAREn (like bear, but 'g') EYEness GROWses BEER, BITT-uh)
I would like a large beer, please.

Noch ein, bitte
(KNOCK EYEn, BITT-uh)
One more, please. Repeat until drunk.

Bezahlen, bitte.
(be-TSALL-en, BITT-uh)
Check, please.

Ihre Bruessten gefaellt mir, viel dank.
(EE-ra BROOS-ten ge-FAYLT MEER, FEEL DONK)
Your service pleased me, many thanks

Naturally, Guenther and Wolfgang wanted me to practice my German, so it was imperative that we see at least one pub, kneipe in German, for every two visits to a Berlin sight.

The Icing On The Cake
Ah yes, it was a fascinating and entertaining trip to Berlin, and two old men and myself were simply exhausted and needed something to eat. We stopped at a random restaurant near Brandenburger Tuer, sat down, ordered our beers and food (see above), and began to recount the trip.

Our food came in the hands of yet another stunning waitress, we noticed that this food was amazing, we weren't exactly eating at McDonalds during this trip, but the fish I had (Seeteufel, or Sea Devil) was the best cooked fish I've had in years. I also liked that Wolfgang told me how much fun he had learning new expressions in English. Throughout most of the trip, he was speaking English, and I was speaking German, and we both found that we enjoy the subtleties of our languages and how they are related.

Guenther had noticed a blonde woman in the corner (the only difference between old men and young men is the amount of time they have spent looking at pretty women) who was eating with another female friend. He asked Wolfgang something quickly that I didn't quite get, and then Wolfgang replied and the word 'Wonderbra' was in the sentence. Guenther said, 'Ja, sie' (Yes, her)

Naturally my attention perked, so I had asked them to speak slowly. Guenther was almost certain that the beautiful young blonde in the corner was Regina Halmich, who also happens to be the current female boxing World Champion. If you've followed the link, you can see why an underwear company would be interested in her modeling their wares.

Now, as you can probably guess, not as many people are familiar with female boxing as male boxing, but Guenther knows boxing thoroughly. Regina has started to become a celebrity in part because of the underwear ads (hence Wolfgang's Wonderbra comment), but Guenther has been following her career for years, probably in part because she's German and winning.

Apparently, this girl is a badass. She lost one time several years ago because of a cut to the eye, but has defended her title against twenty-five female contenders since. Interestingly, she also beat Ali's daughter (Guenther doesn't think Ali's daughter is that good). A local German television show host named Stefan Raab (his show sounds something like the Tom Greene Show) challenged her to a boxing match, and she apparently broke his nose. A Google search shows that she has quite a few fans, too.

Guenther wanted to be sure if she was Regina, so he asked the waitress to ask her to confirm. The waitress, with typical German discretion that I appreciate, refused, saying that it would be impolite.

Guenther was in turmoil. He didn't want to disturb her, but he really wanted her autograph. German celebrities typically sign business cards, and Guenther took out the one I gave him earlier, and then put it back in his wallet. He and Wolfgang were exchanging Maybe ifs, Maybe ifs, Maybe if's for a few minutes, and then we paid and Wolfgang and Guenther stood up saying how this was a wonderful ending to the day, seeing a celebrity in the restaurant.

I could write a novel about how many kind things Guenther had done for me; he had given me money, a place to stay, and advice at times when I really needed it. I watched Guenther go outside as I got my jacket. I then thought about how Alexandra would react if we told her that we saw Regina but didn't ask her for an autograph. Finally, I thought about a line in the old TV show The Commish, where the guy told his son, 'If you don't give her the chance to say no, you don't give her the chance to say yes.'

German caution and discretion be damned, I owed Guenther this much. Wolfgang hadn't stepped outside yet, so I asked him for a card. He didn't have one, so we asked the bartender for a piece of paper and a pen. She gave us one (with a very disapproving look), I looked at her table and noticed no food, and then I walked over towards Regina.

I have never asked for an autograph before, I'm sure most celebrities know how to write, and I wasn't sure what to do besides having the pen ready. The usual standby, honesty, turned out to be the best method. I approached her table, and said, in (heavily accented) German,

Entschuldigung Sie mich, bitte? Excuse me please?

She smiled warmly and said 'Ja'

Swish, from the look on her face, this would be easy.

Sind Sie Regina Halmich? Are you Regina Halmich?

She said Yes, again.

Sweet, at least I wasn't talking to a stranger for no reason.

I skipped the 'I really don't want to bother you...' and cut to the point with a smile and enthusiasm that I didn't have to fake.

'Mein Freund Guenther ist grosser Boxenfan und er haette sehr gern ihre Autograph'

My friend is a big boxing fan and he really would like your autograph.

I didn't see a reason to lie to her saying that I was the fan, because I wasn't. I was hoping that my honesty and intentions of getting it for someone else would be what she noticed.

She smiled again, apparently I wasn't bothering her, hell, maybe my broken German was entertaining her, and said (in German, but I'm tired of writing things twice) that she's sorry that she didn't have a card. I offered her the paper and pen with a shrug and a smile and she said, 'Guenther, like my father. Is it with a T or TH?' I replied 'TH' and she wrote, Fuer Guenther...and Guenther came up behind me (surprisingly, somewhat nervously) and introduced himself.

My first thought was 'Hey Guenther, you're cutting in on my girl here.' (as I said, she's hot, and she was smiling at me), but then I thought about to whom the autograph was addressed and realized it was the best thing that could have happened. She gave Guenther the autograph, we thanked her for her time, and left.

We were driving back to Hannover, and I was sitting quietly in the back seat with a stupid grin on my face. I was a little proud of myself that I had the courage to ask Regina for the autograph, the wisdom to be quick and honest, and mostly glad because finally I could pay Guenther back just a little for the good he has done for me. As we drove, Wolfgang had said,

'I suppose you would say in English that meeting her was the culmination of our trip?'

I replied, 'Naturally that works, but in America we would say that it was the icing on the cake.'


Farewell Reader, have a good day.

Hussman